Political Cortex: Brain Food for the Body Politic

Ann Coulter isn't a happy camper these days. Her President is an unpopular liar, Michelle Malkin is stealing her "Crazy Conservative She-Devil" shtick, and all her idols/Sith Lords are being brought up on one charge or another.

So what does she want? Why, to join them, of course:

I'm getting a little insulted that no Democratic prosecutor has indicted me. Liberals bring trumped-up criminal charges against all the most dangerous conservatives. Why not me?

I never thought she'd admit that conservatives were dangerous. But wait, there's more!

I've done a lot for my country. I think I deserve to be indicted, too. How am I supposed to show my face around Washington if I haven't been "frog-marched" out of my office by some liberal D.A. looking to move to D.C. for the next Democratic administration? What's a girl have to do to become a "person of interest" around here? Mr. Krischer, where do I go to get rid of my reputation?

Can't we help her out?