Political Cortex: Brain Food for the Body Politic

This has been a busy month for the Republicans I know-- parties, parties, parties and shopping.  During this time of year,  shopping goes to dizzying new heights among Republicans in a city like New York. Most of their waking hours are spent agonizing about the gifts. Will they come from Tiffany, Barney's or Tourneau? Outdoing your neighbor takes on a new meaning this time of year. For anyone who doesn't live around here--these stores are what we call upscale retailing. Think: very expensive.

This doesn't leave much time to worry about things like domestic spying--or the constitution. Hell, why give a shit anyhow, we haven't been attacked, have we?  Everything changed on 9/11--what's the matter with you, Armando? What don't you understand about that? We're safe!

After the shopping, there are those pesky, but all-important end of year tax deductions to check and re-check--just like Santa commands. This takes a tremendous amount of time and attention. Lots of stocks to be sold, financial restructuring--you know the drill, and the books close by the crack of midnight on December 31. This is a priority,  Armando, if this is neglected or f**ked up, well, you know what happens--taxes!!

With all these Christmas chores, there isn't much time for anything else. Which, by the way, is what we pay the politicians to do. I mean Armando, if our non-outraged fellow citizens wanted to worry about things like white phosphorous, Tom Delay, Iraq, Katrina survivors, they'd run for office. They hire politicians, just like they hire, nannies, lawyers, accountants to do the work and the worrying for them. This also makes complete sense, doesn't it?

Year-end charitable giving is an other big priority. The accountant deals with the pesky details of this, as well.  Make no mistake though, charitable giving is done to minimize what these folks refer to as the dreaded and unconstitutional "significant tax event." In fact, most of their lives are spent avoiding significant tax events.

If you've been following along, so far, so good. Right? Seems pretty much all is fine in Freeperville.

Let's tackle one final pesky issue here. Patriotism and service.

These Republicans I know, have two two thirty something daughters and a draft age son. They all wear American flag pins--always. It's like you put on your underwear in the morning and you put on your flag pin.  After 9/11 for about a year or so, they traded up for bejeweled American flag lapel pins. I suppose the more jewels, the more patriotic. Okay. I can buy this.  Not any more, they've returned to the plain old metal variety. What's wrong with this patriotism? I don't wear anything in my lapel.

These Republicans have an overweight son would be an excellent candidate for our recruitment-challenged military particularly since he brags shamelessly that he voted for our president. Also a  little basic training might help him shed those nettlesome extra pounds. But he's  happily ensconsed in college, with a C- average.  But what me worry, when he graduates, one of dad's friends will give him a little boost into a Wall Street career.  Sound familiar?

These Republican friends are in a warm weather zone as I write this. If Mr. Bush is listening to their phone conversations or intercepting their emails, they really don't give a rat's ass--because this is what the New York Post and Fox News tells them and, more important, he's making us safer, there haven't been any more attacks on US soil.

During Christmas 2001, after 9/11, they had to pack into their Range Rover and drive to Florida. Airplanes weren't safe. Now airplanes are safe again.

All is good in the world.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.