Missile Defense 
Here is some commentary concerning missile defense that I wrote on August 29th, 2006, three days before the latest missile defense test (unbeknownst to me at the time). That test was touted as a success! The next test will be in December, and they will try to hit the mock enemy missile AGAIN, under even more difficult test conditions. Critics note that terrorists would be unlikely to use missiles, and could hit us using smaller nuclear devices contained in things such as trucks. Keep your fingers crossed!
August 29th, 2006
Experts now say that the North Koreans are capable of bombing the United States with their new long-range missile. President Bush is telling us not to worry, because our anti-missile defense shield will protect us. (Did I miss something?) Didn't the anti-missile defense system fail every single test miserably? "Well, it's really hard," they told us. "It's like trying to hit a bullet with a bullet." They should have told us that before they spent 100 billion of the taxpayers' money (this figure according to Philip Coyle III, Senior Advisor for the President of Defense Information). Instead of spending 100 billion and trying to hit bullets with bullets, wouldn't it be easier to just hit Kim Jong-Il with a bullet? Don't they have special guys who do that sort of thing? Instead of spending 100 billion and trying to hit bullets with bullets, they should try not being such jerks to the rest of the world, and maybe others wouldn't try to nuke us. "No," says Bush, "you don't understand---we will prevail! They hate us because we're so much BETTER than they are."
I don't understand why these flag-waving, "greatest nation in history" patriots get so worked up to celebrate our nation's independence on the 4th of July, when we are extremely dependent on foreign oil. Plus we have characters like the presidents of Iran and Venezuela literally holding us over a barrel of oil! In fact, Senior Advisor Philip Coyle seems to be more concerned about not having a permanent, reliable supply of energy than he is about enemy missiles! He notes that we are in competition with the booming economies of China and India down to the last drop of oil left! And we're also dependent on China for our manufactured goods. And we're dependent on Mexico for the workers who are willing to do the jobs that Americans don't want to do. We're dependent on India for 24-hour technical support on the telephone. Just what independence are they referring to? (The King of England? That was 230 years ago! Look around. Things have changed. There IS no more independence!)
Our enemies have convenient names. At the height of his antagonism, I called Saddam Hussein---Saddam Insane. I call Kim Jong-il---Kim Jong Mentally-Il. And then there's Bin Laden. It's interesting that he should be named Bin, because he belongs in a loony bin. So there's Loony Bin Laden, and now there's a newer name to add to the list. He's a president who intimidates the press; bullies his political opponents, and also makes vicious threats against the US. I call him Huge-o Ego Chavez. How do you pronounce the president of Iran's first name (Mahoud)? Is it ma-hude? Then he's Rude Mahoud. Forget about his last name (Ahmadinejad), I can't even pronounce it (yet)! But I'm working on it. He's another character who we'll keep in our sights.
Experts now say that the North Koreans are capable of bombing the United States with their new long-range missile. President Bush is telling us not to worry, because our anti-missile defense shield will protect us. (Did I miss something?) Didn't the anti-missile defense system fail every single test miserably? "Well, it's really hard," they told us. "It's like trying to hit a bullet with a bullet." They should have told us that before they spent 100 billion of the taxpayers' money (this figure according to Philip Coyle III, Senior Advisor for the President of Defense Information). Instead of spending 100 billion and trying to hit bullets with bullets, wouldn't it be easier to just hit Kim Jong-Il with a bullet? Don't they have special guys who do that sort of thing? Instead of spending 100 billion and trying to hit bullets with bullets, they should try not being such jerks to the rest of the world, and maybe others wouldn't try to nuke us. "No," says Bush, "you don't understand---we will prevail! They hate us because we're so much BETTER than they are."
I don't understand why these flag-waving, "greatest nation in history" patriots get so worked up to celebrate our nation's independence on the 4th of July, when we are extremely dependent on foreign oil. Plus we have characters like the presidents of Iran and Venezuela literally holding us over a barrel of oil! In fact, Senior Advisor Philip Coyle seems to be more concerned about not having a permanent, reliable supply of energy than he is about enemy missiles! He notes that we are in competition with the booming economies of China and India down to the last drop of oil left! And we're also dependent on China for our manufactured goods. And we're dependent on Mexico for the workers who are willing to do the jobs that Americans don't want to do. We're dependent on India for 24-hour technical support on the telephone. Just what independence are they referring to? (The King of England? That was 230 years ago! Look around. Things have changed. There IS no more independence!)
Our enemies have convenient names. At the height of his antagonism, I called Saddam Hussein---Saddam Insane. I call Kim Jong-il---Kim Jong Mentally-Il. And then there's Bin Laden. It's interesting that he should be named Bin, because he belongs in a loony bin. So there's Loony Bin Laden, and now there's a newer name to add to the list. He's a president who intimidates the press; bullies his political opponents, and also makes vicious threats against the US. I call him Huge-o Ego Chavez. How do you pronounce the president of Iran's first name (Mahoud)? Is it ma-hude? Then he's Rude Mahoud. Forget about his last name (Ahmadinejad), I can't even pronounce it (yet)! But I'm working on it. He's another character who we'll keep in our sights.
KEYWORDS: Missile Defense, Mahoud Ahmadinejad, Independence
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